And it doesn't even hurt!

Are you tired? Wish you were more energized? Feel like you're missing a sense of ZEST in your life?!?!?!?

If you have experienced any of these symptoms, you might be a candidate for Marissa-Replacement-Therapy (MRT). MRT is scientifically proven to enhance mood and propel you into a state of ecstasy— where pills, drugs, and alchie don't even hold A CANDLE! With just one dose of MRT, why, your whole body will feel revitalized— especially your glutes.

In order to experiment with MRT, you have to be at least 24, have had Lasik-eye surgery, and swear by gruel morning, noon, and night. You should have also spent hours upon hours of data entry and feel urges to go to bed with Alexander Hammy. In addition, you should identify yourself as "an old man."

So what are you waiting for???

Call now and order your FREE prescription today! Shipping and Handling: Your MRT may arrive within 3-5 business days, if you have already placed your order.

NOTE: MRT is a type of therapy that does not require long-term use. Symptoms may improve instantly within just 1-3 hours, depending upon the patient. Side effects may include fatigue, breathlessness, hot flushes and night sweats, palpitations (rapid, irregular heart beats), aches and pains in the joints and an overwhelming sense of desire. There is a slight addiction factor. Users are advised.

A Night at the Opera

Last night I went to the opening night of Andrea Chénier with my Aunt. I am officially an opera convert. We sat in the Grand Tier, section A, overlooking the orchestra. It was just beautiful, very traditional and the costumes were outrageous!!!! The music was enough to give you chills, and I loved the story line-- had to do with betrayal during the french revolution, and of course there's love, unrequited love and death!

A Remembered High

Today I ran. Today I ran and it felt amazing. I felt like I had been running for months now. It's as though everything clicked today, and I'm back from the dead. I think a week of alternative exercise (skiing) and proper recovery plus keeping fitness levels high w/ cross-training and wt-training has aided in this revival. I ran on the treadmill at 6.0, and increased in increments, up to 6.5. I ran 3 mi in 30min. Although this is a huge gap in what I used to do at 7.5-8.5, I am very proud of myself for being able to keep the speed low & not feel the impulsive or competitive urge to increase the number. I stretched for 15 minutes post exercise. I did not feel the accompanying burning sensations in my quad, knee or hip later on in the day. I felt refreshed, rejuvinated, renewed. I feel like a runner again.

WIKIPEDIA, time to get YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT FROM ME

Henry VIII was said to have died from gout, the syph, and his being grossly overweight. According to Wikipedia, "The well known theory [was] that he suffered from syphilis... More recent support for this idea has come from a greater understanding of the disease and has led to the suggestion that Edward VI, Mary I, and Elizabeth I all displayed symptoms characteristic of congenital syphilis. Henry's increased size dates from a jousting accident in 1536. He suffered a thigh wound which not only prevented him from taking exercise, but also gradually became ulcerated and may have indirectly led to his death..."

Well, Wiki, though your facts are correct, Henry VIII did not die (as assumed) from gout, or venereal disease. I will postulate that he died of SCURVY because he didn't eat any FRUIT! One of the classic symptoms of Scurvy, (besides violent swings of temperament due to vit C's coenzymatic function in synthesizing norepinephrine, which if low, can lead to mood disorders) is BLEEDING and improper healing of wounds. That ulceration from a thigh wound was INDEED related to his death-- a little more DIRECTLY than people want to admit.

According to Jasper Ridley, "...he beheaded two wives, defied the pope and waged the 100 year's war." Did he lack a conscience or just vitamin C??

This man needed a piece of fruit, ladies and gents!